Courage

Ever get the feeling like you should be further along than you are? Further along in your career, in your personal life, with all that you have manifested? I do. All the time. I have been utterly frustrated and quite honestly sad and depressed that 'IT' hasn't happened the way I have wanted it to.

In a healing session tonight I went through the gamut of reasons why I have not made it to the level I want to, from women sending me negative energy because of their jealousy towards me, to people stealing my ideas and using them as their own, to allowing past life experiences to influence me in the present. Feeling invisible, unacknowledged, undermined, unappreciated, lonely, isolated, unheard.

I see that all these things are ways 'I' have sabotaged myself. Used them as reasons to not move forward. Making them the excuses for not being in my power. Giving myself away at every turn. Allowing people to ignore me, not pay me what I'm worth, not follow through with me.

I am a pioneer. I am a visionary. I am a powerful force that has been holding back, playing small. Taking on others' insecurities, jealousy and negativity and therefore not creating a clear pathway to healing for myself and others for by playing small and not fulfilling my highest, grandest purpose I stifle myself and others and deprive the world of gifts that could spread joy.

Today I pray for the courage to move past these perceptions because that is all they are. Illusions, fear, an unwillingness to be big and empowered. It's actually quite selfish to hold all this back. It creates this feeling of shrinking, holding on and anxiety.

I change this story and invite you to do the same and be bright and shiny in your uniqueness and brilliance.